PROJECTIVE IDENTIFICATION

The coach adapts the clients unowned feelings

as their own.

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victim? not me!

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coach

client

you!

I am a victim

response

PROJECTION

The client has an unowned feeling or quality,

that they project onto the coach.

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victim? not me!

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coach

client

you!

TRANFERENCE

The client sees the coach as someone from their past and transfers the same feelings onto them.

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mom

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coach

client

COUNTER - TRANFERENCE

The coach's reaction to the transference.

 

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mom

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coach

client

nurture

response

Relational Dynamics between Client & Coach
Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

before

moment

afterwards

The Bus Journey
Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

moment

The Bus Journey
Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

before

afterwards

repair

catch

anticipate

before

  • space

  • time

  • dress code

  • ground

  • open heart

  • bring in MC's

  • authority

  • check client

  • check notes

  • check CT

coaching session

now

block

therapeutic window

history

titrate, regulate, embodiment, 1st & 2nd wave, MC work, ...

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set somatic marker

moving towards integration

action

steps

now

start

  • welcome

  • landing

  • grounding (if needed)

end

  • questions

  • reflection

  • close

  • goodbye

  • schedule next meeting

after

  • clear self

  • clear space

  • write notes

  • supervision

Framework of a Coaching Session
©Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

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(PARA)SYMPATHETIC

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENT

prefrontal cortex

connect to self

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connect to other

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safely embodied, self & co-regulate, can connect to self and others,  acknowledge distress, explore options, reach out for / offer support, resources & resourceful

SOCIAL ENGAGEMENT

prefrontal cortex

mind

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please

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still present, but starting to rationalise, intellectualise, please, fawn, be nice, appease and try to fit in 

SYMPATHETIC

lymbic system

fight

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flight

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alarmed, hypervigilant, feel out if sync with others, misread cues, listen for sounds, sacrifice social engagement for survival

PARASYMPATHETIC

brainstem

freeze

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collapse

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dissociate

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withdraw, shut down, go through the motions without awareness, disconnect from self, others, feel lost, abandoned, invisible, disappear into a state of not knowing, not feeling, not being

The Nervous System
©Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

fight

flight

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mind

please

Surfing the Nervous System
©Women's Inner Leadership, 2022

freeze

collapse

dissociate